December 09, 2003
Klingon rules for systems development

Todays tidbit from my inbox, a special for people who are Star Trek fans AND software developers:

Top 10 things likely to be overheard from a Klingon Programmer

10. Specifications are for the weak and timid!
9. You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand!
8. Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I indent your skull!
7. What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software 'releases' Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers and quality assurance people in its wake.
6. Klingon function calls do not have 'parameters' - they have 'arguments' - and they ALWAYS WIN THEM.
5. Debugging? Klingons do not debug. Our software does not coddle the weak.
4. A TRUE Klingon Warrior does not comment on his code!
3. Klingon software does NOT have BUGS. It has FEATURES, and those features are too sophisticated for a Romulan pig like you to understand.
2. You cannot truly appreciate Dilbert unless you've read it in the original Klingon.
1. Our users will know fear and cower before our software! Ship it! Ship it and let them flee like the dogs they are!

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nice!

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Kjetil Helle's Weblog: Klingon rules for software engineering (December 10, 2003 12:29 AM)
"For some of the geeky ones of us, you know, the ones that like Star Trek and who's also a software engineer, these 10 rules will make you express LOLs, ROFLs and so on: :-) Top 10 things likely to..."
Daily Dictum: Klingon Coders (December 10, 2003 04:20 AM)
"Top 10 things likely to be overheard from a Klingon Programmer: 10. Specifications are for the weak and timid! 9. You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand! 8. Indentation?! - I will show..."
rc6.org: Top 10 things likely to be overheard from a Klingon Programmer (December 11, 2003 08:30 AM)
"Top 10 things likely to be overheard from a Klingon Programmer 10. Specifications are for the weak and timid! 9. You question the worthiness of my code? I should kill you where you stand! 8. Indentation?! - I will show you how to indent when I ind"
Daily Delusions: Specifications are for the weak (December 11, 2003 06:42 PM)
"I just had a great laugh, go click the link, go go : Anders Jacobsen's blog: Klingon rules for systems development..."
Mulling it over: http://mullingitover.com/archives/000457.html (January 29, 2004 01:26 AM)
"Programmers, be sure to read Klingon rules for systems development (Anders Jacobsen's blog). My personal favorite: 7. What is this talk of 'release'? Klingons do not make software 'releases' Our software 'escapes' leaving a bloody trail of designers an..."
Enjoy Every Sandwich: Take Out: The Daily Doggy Bag of Blog Bits for 29 Jan 2004 (January 29, 2004 07:25 AM)
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